Man, I suck at reviewing movies on time almost as much as I suck at having a blog. I'm really bad at blogging nowadays. I'm like the Michigan football of blogging, and I feel awful about that. To be honest, I'm shocked anyone still reads this thing. I'm so goddamn lazy there are like 11 half-written posts that are just languishing there because I don't have enough self-discipline to finish. There's an approx. 5000 word LOST post that's been sitting there for more than a year now and is about 70% done but I can't get in the right frame of mind to wrap it up. Now I'm so awful at blogging that I can't even put up 3 paragraph movie reviews until more than a week after I've seen the damn movie. So, in summation of this opening whine-fest on my part, I apologize if you actually enjoy reading these reviews... because I am the absolute worst at putting them up. I saw "Your Highness" last Friday (opening night), and just never got around to typing up this thing.. basically defeating the purpose of blogging movie reviews altogether by waiting more than a week to put it up. But oh well, here goes nothing..So "Your Highness" is a flick that I've been pumped to see since I first discovered it was being made. Danny McBride, James Franco, the creative forces behind Pineapple Express & Eastbound & Down, and two of the biggest crushes of my relative youth, Natalie Portman and the lovely Zooey Deschenal.. I mean, what's not to like, right? When the preview for this one hit, I was fond of saying that it felt like this movie was specifically written for me. Alas, my high comedic expectations began to be tempered when the reviews hit... almost all of which were emphatically negative. But I still had enough excitement to head out opening night, an honor reserved for only those most anticipated of flicks. Would Danny McBride deliver again? Or would this swords & sorcery clownfest fall short?
Let me preface this review by saying I LOVE Danny McBride. Whether he's Kenny Powers or an FX guy in "Tropic Thunder" or a drug dealer in Pineapple Express, he makes me laugh my ass off.. so bear that in mind. This movie is completely clown. Completely, utterly clown. I feel like its intended audiences are 13-16 year old boys and 19-30 year old stoners.. and yes, these two groups share basically the exact same sense of humor. The number one thing this movie is is dumb. It is often painfully, excruciatingly dumb, but at the same time, there are laughs to be had, and quite a few of them.
The plot is rather nonsensical but basically goes as follows.. in a magical kingdom, there are two princes, one, Fabious (Franco), is brave and bold and strong, who goes on many quests, bringing glory to the kingdom. His younger brother Thadeus spends his days wenching and drinking and generally having a roaring good time, being a general fuck-up. When Fabious' bride (Zooey Deschanel) is stolen away by an evil wizard (Justin Theroux) who would use her to complete a prophecy to bring darkness to the earth, King Tallious orders Thaddeus to accompany his brother on the quest to rescue Belladonna and defeat the evil wizard's plot. Along the way there are betrayals, challenges, creatures, battles and dangers aplenty.. the travelers also meet a fellow quest-er in the person of Isabel, a lovely and deadly warrior in her own right. Along the way, Thaddeus comes into his own and proves his worth. But let's be honest here, no one's seeing "Your Highness" for the plot, centered around a prophecy known as "the fuckening".
This is a flick that feels disjointed and rather thrown together. At times it is completely, utterly silly, at other times it expects the audience to take the actions on screen somewhat seriously. Much like Pineapple Express, it tries to have its cake and eat it too.. to have very sincere and violent action scenes accompanying outrageous comedic scenes. That is a mix that in my experience is very, very hard to pull off.
The leads are all solid and seem to be enjoying themselves. If you like Danny McBride and what he brings to the table you'll laugh a lot at this one. Franco is very good as the straight man to McBride's outrageous debauchery. Miss Deschenal is clearly enjoying her silly ass character and I have a theory about Natalie Portman's 2010. I think she knew she was going to get knocked up (didn't really care who..) so she took every pay check she could get in an effort to make a bunch of cash to pay for a few years of maternity leave. I mean Black Swan, that Ashton Kutcher friends w/ benefits movie, Your Highness, Thor.. there is literally nothing linking these flicks except for the paycheck. But Portman is very sincere and her character grows on you. The supporting characters are sufficiently outrageous and bring their share of laughs. I especially enjoyed a silly ass mechanical bird who just kind of hangs around with his own certain charm.
Ultimately though, this movie can't tell what it wants to be. There is very hard R violence alongside silly ass comedy. Much like Pineapple Express, that leaves the flick lacking an identity. A lot of the humor comes from modern terminology while mixed with medieval phrases and english accents (Magic... motherfucker). So while I laughed a whole hell of a lot, I can't say I loved or even really liked this one. I can conclusively say, however, that if you laugh at Danny McBride, you'll laugh at least 20 times.. which is rather a lot.
6/10
