2011: The Year in Film: "Transformers: Dark of the Moon" Review

First, a couple of confessions. As I'm sure you've figured out by now, I'm a whore for spectacle. I'm a total sci-fi nerd and big-budget flicks are simply the only place where visual spectacle on the level of a "Star Wars" or "Star Trek" or "Avatar" is possible. To me, there's nothing wrong with escapist entertainment. Are big-budget action flicks going to revolutionize your worldview? No. But why do they have to? If you're really so dreadfully serious that you can't turn it off and enjoy a spectacle for what it is, I truly feel sorry for you. However, there are good spectacles and bad spectacles. Michael Bay has been responsible for plenty on both sides of that equation. Hardly any director is as divisive among movie fans as Mr. Bay. He's made flicks that stand up against any other action flicks of the past 15 years (Bad Boys, The Rock, Bad Boys 2, The Island, Transformers) while also making some complete shitballs (Pearl Harbor, Armageddon, Transformers 2). However, whether his movies are on the good side or the bad side of the spectacle equation.. they're going to be big, they're going to be loud, people are going to die, shit is going to blow up and you're going to be in for a ride. Whether that ride sucks or not depends on certain factors that apparently only Mr. Bay is privy to.

My second confession is that I love Transformers. Not the film franchise of recent years so much as the old school (known as Gen-1 in fan parlance) cartoons that aired along with GI Joe back in the days of my young childhood. Transformers were a big hit in the Brenner household. Not only because they are giant alien robots (which is, in and of itself, inherently awesome), but because they are heroic, man. Optimus Prime is one of the all-time stand-up dudes. He's like Ned Stark without the idiot streak. He's like Luke Skywalker without the self-doubt and whining. He's a true-blue hero and all around good guy. Sort of like Abe Lincoln plus Captain American plus Maximus. All-around stand up guy. You want Optimus to raise your kids and can leave him around your wife. This 3 minute youtube clip will show you what Optimus Prime was up to back in the 80's and why he's ingrained in my consciousness as a hero for this and every time: (and yes, the music only makes it more awesome) So yes, that's Optimus Prime mowing down half of the Decepticon roster and then taking out Megatron despite a litany of dirty tricks and tactics. Needless to say, once Mike Bay hired Peter Cullen to be the voice of Optimus Prime (you may recognize the voice in the cartoon..), he had me hooked. Some continuity of character and boom.. I'm on board, Mike Bay.

So, with me having confessed that I'm a sucker for spectacle and that I will forever have a soft spot for Transformers generally and Optimus Prime specifically (I had an Optimus Prime poster in my room from about 2003 onward..) enter my Transformers 3 review at your own peril. That being said, however, the Transformers movie franchise has been a troubled one. The first flick is a lot of fun.. and I feel it pretty perfectly captured the spirit of the Gen-1 cartoon that so enthralled the boy I was. At the heart of the Transformers story is a battle of good vs. evil, but it's more than that.. it's an alien civil war that humans have been thrust in the midst of and one heroic side takes the side of humankind even over themselves. There's something admirable and damn heroic about that. And hell, I can be a sappy bastard.. the friendship and even.. love? that is shared between the Autobots and their human friends is a big part of the appeal. So the first movie captured a lot of that feeling and spirit and that was a big part of the draw for me. Sure, there were battles and explosions, but at its heart, the movie was about the relationship between a regular dude and the group of 50 foot sentient alien robots he happened to run into. The second flick sort of lost sight of that heart, amongst other things, and lost its way in a web of bloated new characters, a convoluted plot, incomprehensible action sequences and childish "comedy" in the form of juvenile cracks about sex, balls, race and the like. I'd give the first Transformers a 7.5 or so and Transformers 2 a solid 5. No one's actually said that this is the last Transformers flick.. but it's been hinted as much.. and it certainly seems and feels like it is.. so last go-round Mr. Bay, let's see if the good or evil Mike Bay is going to come around this time.

The opening sequence is damn cool. Basically, it treats the space race of the 1960s as a race to discover alien (Transformer) tech on the moon (there was 21 minutes of radio silence on the first moon mission, after all). (Hence the "Dark of the Moon" of the title) Something long thought lost to the Transformers turns out to have been on earth's moon the whole time.. and this technology turns out to be the key to the entire eons-long war between the Decepticons and Autobots. A long-simmering plot by the Decepticons, lying in hiding after their defeat in the second film, brings the conflict to a head, here on earth, and full-fledged war erupts with humanity caught in the middle. Amongst this background, our erstwhile hero, Sam Wittwicky, tries to move on with his life, with a new girl, and trying to get a "regular" job, now that his friends, the Autobots, have moved on without him.

First, this is a much, much better film than the last go-round. The last flick felt like it was made by a 14 year old boy with a high CGI budget and no adult supervision. WAY too many stupid cracks and just needlessly silly scenes sabotaged the last film from the jump. Here, there are still silly cracks and John Turturro is still WAY over the top and cheesy, but it's been scaled way back to tolerable levels. I did see the flick in 3D (not by choice, although Bay did supposedly work with Cameron on the conversion), and while the 3D is very, very cool for the battle scenes (you're actually able to tell the robots apart, which was borderline impossible in the large battle at the close of Transformers 2) and several other scenes, on the whole.. it doesn't add a lot and it makes the flick needlessly dim, as 3D is want to do. So it's a mixed bag on the 3D. I will say this, it's well done and doesn't look cheap.. it just doesn't add THAT much to the flick as a whole. So the flick feels like grown-ups made it, which is a nice break.. and the "heart" that was largely missing from the last flick has returned, as Sam "shares" several nice scenes with Optimus and Bumblebee. He's given a decent amount of personal drama as well. But let's cut to the chase.. you're coming to a Transformers flick for the battles.. and let me tell you, this one does not disappoint. I literally felt exhausted leaving the theater. The last hour of the flick is one prolonged battle scene.. and it looks incredible. I know of nothing that approaches the level of epic-ness this one achieves other than Return of the King, the last Lord of the Rings flick. Granted, that was a much, much, much better flick all-around, but in terms of a prolonged epic battle? Yeah. That's the neighborhood we're in.

So on the whole, this is definitely a Transformers movie. It's big, it's loud, it's childish in parts.. but it's fun, it's intense without being overwhelming, and I, for one, am always a fan of good old-fashioned heroism. It's good guys vs. bad guys, with the fate of the world at stake.. and the action scenes are so damn well done. What can I say, like I said, I'm a sucker for spectacle.

7/10, a return to form for the Transformers franchise, and I for one am glad Optimus Prime gets to go out on top.. he deserves it. This flick will make $500 million.

2011: The Year in Film: "Green Lantern" Review

Green Lantern Over at DC Comics they have to be pulling out their hair in bunches. Marvel successfully self-financed several of their second-tier heroes to Blockbuster status, and seen Spider Man and the X-Men achieve serious success with other studios while DC has managed to only turn Batman and Superman into successful films, while Superman is currently languishing after a sub-par last effort. Warner Brothers owns the film rights to the DC collection, and with "Green Lantern", we see their first foray into the deeper parts of the catalog. With a rumored budget of $200 million (plus an additional $100 million with the summer's largest marketing campaign), and the Harry Potter franchise drawing to a close in a few weeks, Warner was desperate for a new tentpole franchise to be a summer staple and hopefully that Ryan Reynolds and the Green Lantern would provide just that. While time will ultimately tell how the flick performs and the stage is certainly set for a sequel, unfortunately, the flick just falls a little flat. But, on with the review.

Green Lantern is one of the trippier super heroes out there. He achieves his power, which basically is to create green energy manifestations out of anything he can imagine through sheer power of will, through a ring and a lantern that are imbued with the green power of will through the Guardians of the Universe on a distant planet called Oa. The universe is divided into 3600 sections, and earth, located in section 2814, has long been under the protection of a particularly powerful Green Lantern. When this lantern falls to a foe long thought dead, the ring seeks out a replacement.. someone said to be without fear. This happens to be Hal Jordan, the first human ever selected to be a Green Lantern, a brash and cocky test pilot whose life is apparently in shambles despite his baller apartment and line of hot chicks dying to fall into bed with him. Poor Hal. But alas, origin story ensues, with Hal rising to the occasion and fighting for the forces of good. He travels to Oa to receive his training and meet the other members of the Green Lantern Corps, where it is revealed that a grave threat to the safety of the Universe and Lantern Corps has returned. Like I said, pretty nonsensical, even for super heroes, but it's actually kind of cool in the way that whoever actually thought it up was particularly crazy. I respect that.




So this movie has been getting absolutely shredded by the critics. I'm not sure how much of that is fair, but some of it surely is. It feels rushed and thrown together in parts. Some parts are good, some even very good, but others fall flat and overall the flick comes off as very uneven and the last half hour is very, very rushed. Martin Campbell directs, (best known for Goldeneye AND Casino Royale) and he does a fine job. The primary problems here are with the script, as some parts simply do not work. Ryan Reynolds stars as Hal Jordan/the titular Green Lantern, and he's perfectly likable and charming, good even in spots. I'm surprised the flick didn't get more positive reviews simply because of how likable Reynolds is. Blake Lively stars as Carol Ferris, his love interest/co-worker/boss, and the flick is at its best when Lively and Reynolds are together. They clearly have chemistry, and she's downright good at being in movies, which is surprising to me because it seems odd that someone who was in "Gossip Girl" would actually be good at acting. Let me also state for the record that I've had a huge crush on her since "Accepted". Marc Strong is "Sinestro", the leader of the Lantern Corps.. and he's pretty darn good as well. But for me, the treat of the movie was Peter Saarsgard. He's been on my "main man" list for a while, and he absolutely crushes his part in this flick... and longtime acquaintance of Ferris and Hal who happens to be a scientist and come into contact with the evil power rising in the galaxy. Saarsgard is actually really good, and one of the shames of the flick is that he's just sort of allowed to lapse away in favor of bigger, badder bad guys. I rather enjoyed his little storyline. Tim Robbins plays a Senator/Peter's dad and seems criminally underused as well.

Therein lies the main problem. The flick is too concerned about jumping from place to place.. from Oa, to Earth, to various places Hal is going, to various government offices and stuff without much warning or very much explanation. Some parts work very well.. as I said, pretty much everything with Saarsgard is gold. Reynolds and Lively are good together and their scenes work. I like the stuff on Oa (I'm a sucker for a good training sequence and Strong has charisma). But.. there's just too much expository dialogue and cheesiness going on. In the post Dark Knight/X-Men 2/Iron Man universe, this feels more in line with a "Men in Black" or other clownish late 90's movie. The CGI (of which 75% of the movie consists of) at times looks great and other times looks like a PS3 game... that is to say, not so great.

So even though there's quite a bit to like about this movie and it is in no way "bad", I simply can't give it a ringing endorsement. The plot moves in spurts and there's just way, way, way too much cheese. For instance, Thor is similarly nonsensical.. but it never comes across as cheesy. Here, nothing resembles an actual reality.. and that takes away from the gravitas of the happenings.

I'm going to give it a 6/10.. even though Reynolds is very likable and the actors did basically everything they could. Sorry, Green Lantern, I just Can't give you a ringing endorsement.